So I’m dating a few dudes, blah blah blah. It’s partially my job and partially because the thought of all my eggs in one basket makes me chicken out. Most of the time, I select people in different groups so as not to cross swords. (Okay, I’m just disgusting now…and kidding. Srsly. Kidding.) Then the following happened.
My friend was with a guy, let’s call him Spiro, I went out with and text with. She does not fully know that we have been out on an actual date (but hell, she does now), and made out on several occasions. We don’t kiss and tell. So my friend and Spiro run into a guy that my friend knows I have been out with several times. Let’s call him John. She says, “Oh, John! Nice to see you. You know Spiro. The two of you met at [insert exclusive event here].” The two gentlemen confirm prior meeting and shake hands. My friend goes on, “So I heard you went out with Emma?”

At which point I wish I could have seen the look on Spiro’s face.
Then John replies, “Actually, we have been out on several dates.” And smiles with a love-stricken twinkle in his eye.

At which point I wish I could have seen the new look on Spiro’s face.

Then, because my friend doesn’t know that I had been seeing both of them, she goes on, “Oh, that is so great. You two would be so cute together. Emma is the best. Isn’t she so funny and such a witty writer. And I love how she pulls off embellished tights.” (This may be exaggerated for dramatic effect.)

John, thinking about his several dates, smiles and says something like, “Yes she is great.” He does not know that the man one foot in front of him is also dating this lovely lady.
At which point Spiro is wondering what he means by “great” and how great she… er, me… really is. His ego is shaken. His eyes divert. He nervously checks his phone hoping the conversation will end. And it does. That was awkward.
But I found out why Spiro stopped texting me back. If you aim to date more than one guy, which you should unless you are married then you should not, go to lengths to make sure they never meet each other. Letting friends in on the secrets can help as well because sometimes, it’s totally necessary to kiss and tell.
The End.

Emma Dinzebach

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