So I got sucked into the show after one episode for several reasons one being I love the Destin Pfaff’s mohawk, but also because Patti is positively sublime. For years my friends have  been warning me away from guys who might catch my eye the first few times around, but aren’t well-suited for long term love. While I was running around town choosing men based on their cool careers and shoe type, my friends were desperately trying to set me up with men who might actually be Mr. Right.

But I didn’t listen because I wasn’t ready. The men and women on Millionaire Matchmaker don’t listen because something is wrong with them in their insides. Mostly the men. Sometimes the millionairesses cannot find a mate because it’s legit hard to meet their match. (I have sent several exes Patti’s way. I hope she helps them.)

When it came to my own team of dedicated matchmakers (the best matchmakers are Jewish), I blew them off and did whatever I damn well pleased. Each time I ignored their heeding, I ended up in break-up land. Not that it’s so bad, rebounds are great and I you get to belt out Christina, Carrie and Kelly. But ugh, the cycle. Then you get used to the cycle and start to think that vicious cycle is the way dating is. Like it or lump it. But, like the show’s millionaires, you are wrong. And you aren’t getting on television.

That neurotic, anxiety-ridden, delusional dating served a purpose for me, provided me with material for my book. But never again will I date that way. Nope. Never. (I’m also not currently dating because, like I told one guy this evening, I do not want to have a strong feeling - lustful or disdain, one way or the other - about anything until I am finished writing this book.) When it is time for me to date someone (assuming I have to go back to dating) I will date with a much more direct intention. Because, like Patti says, we all want the red sea to part and the angles to trumpet and the angles to cantillate Alleluia, but in reality, sometimes we have to just swim across the damned thing. Tons of mates fall out of the sky, it’s knowing how to pick the right one - the mate who possesses your no exceptions qualifications and is (mainly) free of internal torment - that makes all the difference.

Emma Dinzebach

Posted by Emma Dinzebach at 12:01 AM Bargain News , Expert Advice , TRENDS , What women over 40 want , What women in their 30s want , What women in their 20's want , BARGAIN-HUNTING , Relationships , The Vogue City | Trackback | Print This Post